New anecdotal evidence shows that 99% of Americans oppose the death penalty for themselves

it’s almost ludicrously simple, and certainly obvious, just ask people

Do you feel you should be put to death for the crimes you have committed over the course of your lifetime to date?

Just go ahead and try, just ask a couple of people… we did and then we got bored and ordered a pizza, but just to prove that we were serious about this, when he showed up to deliver the pie we asked him straight out,

“Do you deserve to be put to death for something you’ve done that we don’t know about?” And Fattrucker was standing right there at the door with us, with a clipboard and about 79 harmonicas, playing TAPS in different keys… we didn’t get a verbal answer but the guy ran like hell… we didn’t even get to tip him, so we know that he meant what he did.

Why then can’t we abolish the death penalty? Like, duh?


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