Facebook temporary profiles uncontrollably backsliding to early ugliest shower selfies – crisis hotlines in meltdown

We can’t even count the people who woke up to this Krapshow before they were even done throwing up…

It’s a freaking frigging debacle, said Bobo Brazilwax, a local unlicensed mobile freelance throat rolfer from hesheits experimental hush hush Vape-Hoverboard as he crashed suddenly into an open Con-Edwina gender-non-specific hole in the Hu-man-hattan Hi-rez lo-rent rowboat community alongside a newly sprung river of tears in an undisclosed toxic runoff feeding the Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis Reservoir earlier this millenium, like maybe 5am eastern time this morning but we’re not sure, we’re movin’ okay? On it.

“You can’t make this krap up, Bobo continued, Krapchat.com already did.”

Follow this story throughout the rest of the millenium as we ride it hard and eventually forget to put it away, dead and forgotten.

Near as we can tell, this is serious, so you got only a few choices here.
BUY THIS T SHIRT – last one!

ORĀ BUY SOME RING DINGS
they look like hockey pucks and people have supposedly thrown them on the ice during hockey games and the unsuntanned players come up and smack em with their sticks until they splatter to smithereens if they can get tickets of course, hot commodity people loves da Zamboni…

tasty drake’s cakes snack morselfs mmm mmm smack dat throw em at the tv it’s a pucked up thing who doesn’t love the chocolate like taste or whatever in their snack thing?
OR what else, you can sing the blues in which case you might have a guitar and maybe you need some guitarpicks and who doesn’t adore, and please don’t tell us if you don’t:
fender guitar picks 351 classic celluloid not that moto crap thin, medium, heavy and EXTRA HEAVY even which are soooo hard to find at the world’s lowest price at least that we can find… buy 4, 8, 12 in a mixed custom bundle if you click this link OR if you’re in a hurry …
each pick a different color, keep em in your wallet or your pocket or your secret little spot right? one thin, one medium, one heavy and one elusive extra heavy, you’re ready for ANYTHING whether you’re on stage or in your basement, bedroom, your mom’s garage or on the road livin’ the dream… unless you’re color blind maybe, black ones white ones brown ones and confetti which is like red white and blue no black but you can buy a t shirt or a hockey puck what the heck…

-30-
XXX

 

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